Re-emerging...
Boskone was alot of fun and a welcome break from the Hell of the previous weeks. It is hard to believe how much time has already gone by-almost three weeks-since Mom passed away. I'm really still stunned with it all, I have to confess. Only now am I getting a grip on the full situation. She is not on vacation. She is not coming back home.
All this said, some creativity is coming back to me. It's taking it's time. It's less to do with grieving as it is, the shock of seeing someone you have known since you can remember, fade away in front of you. I have no brothers or sisters, only my wife, some relatives in the UK, and, some disperate and disenfranchised ones on this side of the pond. It makes me feel a tad "alone" in the world, despite that really being an illogical feeling. I have good friends and a wonderful wife and her family. Boskone was wonderful. I made some sales and won "Best Artist" which was something welcome and made me feel less a dinosaur in this field as I have been feeling.
Slowly but surely I re-emerge. Expect something visual in the next day. I did do a nice small dragon painting that'll be up in the next day or so.
All this said, some creativity is coming back to me. It's taking it's time. It's less to do with grieving as it is, the shock of seeing someone you have known since you can remember, fade away in front of you. I have no brothers or sisters, only my wife, some relatives in the UK, and, some disperate and disenfranchised ones on this side of the pond. It makes me feel a tad "alone" in the world, despite that really being an illogical feeling. I have good friends and a wonderful wife and her family. Boskone was wonderful. I made some sales and won "Best Artist" which was something welcome and made me feel less a dinosaur in this field as I have been feeling.
Slowly but surely I re-emerge. Expect something visual in the next day. I did do a nice small dragon painting that'll be up in the next day or so.
posted by Bob Eggleton (Zillabob) | 5:58 PM
3 Comments:
It is not an illogical feeling at all, it is actualy very normal. Blood ties are very few for all of us, the more we lose, the more alone we feel.
It's a survival instinct I guess (?).
Hope everything goes well.
It seems to be going well, thanks!
Bob, just catching up on your blog. I really feel for you. One thing I learned when my parents died was that you are never too old to feel like an orphan. It took more than two years before it stopped hurting every day. After that I was able to remember them without pain, most of the time. So hang in there!
Warm hugs to you - virtual ones now, real ones in May!
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